Week 7

Effective Limit Setting

"The impoetance of being clear, Predictable, and Positive"

Notes About Limit Setting

• Don't give unnecessary commands.
• Give one command at a time.
• Be realistic in your expectation and use age-appropiate commands.
• Use "do" commands.
• Make commands positive and polite.
• Don't use "stop" commands.
• Give Children ample opportunity to comply.
• Give warnings and helpful reminders.
• Don't threaten children; use "when-then" commands.
• Give children options whenever possible.
• Make commands short and to the point.
• Support your partner's commands.
• Praise compliance or provise consequences for noncompliance.
• Strike a balance between parent and child control.
• Encourage problem-solving with children.

Clear Commands

"Walk slowly "Please go to bed"

"Keep your hands to your self" "Tell your father about it"

"Talk softly" "Keep the paint on the paper"

"Play quietly" "Wash your hands"

"Come home" "Set the table"

"Colour in black" "Make your bed"

"Please put the clothes away"

Unclear, Vague, Or Negative Commands

"Let's put the toys away" "Wouldn't it be nice to go to bed now?"

"Why don't we go to bed now?" "Hand me the bread, will you?"

"Don't tell" "Be nice, be good, be careful!"

"Shut up" "Watch it"

"Stop running" "Let's not do that anymore"

HOUSEHOLD RULES

Some Examples:

1. Bedtime is at 7:30 p.m.

2. No hitting or teasing allowed.

3. A seat belt must always be warn in the car.

4. Bicycle riding is only allowed on the sidewalk, not in the street.

Make A List Of Your Househols Rules:

Every home needs a limited number of "house rules." If the list gets too long, no one will remember the rules.

Home Activities For The Week

1) Reduce the number of commands you give to those that are most important.
When commands are needed, make them POSITIVE AND SPECIFIC.
Avoid Question and Vague Commands, Such as Let's.


2) Record the types of commands you give at home for 30 minutes, and write down the children's responce.


3) PRAISE your child when every time they comply with a command.


4) Think of some household rules that are important.


Read The Book.

The Incredible Years

The Incredible Years
A Trouble-Shooting Guide for Parents of Children Aged 2-8 Years.

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FULLY REVISED WITH NEW CHAPTERS
that focus on promoting your child's social and emotional competence and ways to help your child be successful in school.

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"The evidence is now beyond dispute. If parents want their children to be successful socially and academically at school, the most important thing they can do is to collaborate with teachers and strive to maintain regular and effective communication."

All children misbehave for a variety of reasons, sometimes simply to test how far they can go to get the attention they crave. Other children are temperamentally more difficult to parent than others because they are impulsive, hyperactive, inattentive or delayed in some aspect of their development. This invaluable handbook provides parents with guidelines not only to help prevent behavior problems form occurring but also with strategies to promote children's social, emotional and academic competence.

NEW CHAPTERS

• How to help your child learn to regulate emotions, make friends and cope with peer problems;
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• How to promote your child's school readiness through interactive reading and child-directed play coaching;
• How to teach social skills to a child who is fearful and shy as well as a child who is hyperactive, impulsive, and inattentive.

DR. CAROLYN WEBSTER-STRATTON is a licensed clinical psychologist, professor and director of the Parenting Clinic at the University of Washington. She is the recipient of the prestigious National Mental Health Research Scientist Award. This book is based on her 25 years of research with over 3000 families. She has published numerous books, chapters and scientific articles concerning treatment of aggression in young children.
Dr. Webster-Stratton lives in Seattle with her husband John; her two children, Seth age 21 and Anna age 18, are in college.

www.incredibleyears.com

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